I’m such a fool. When you said “I hate you” I heard the opposite.
I hate that I love you. I love that I hate you.
You always pop up at the precise moment that I’ve decided it’s okay for you to stay gone.
When we chat online now, I type “I love you” over and over and then delete it character by character. I think I hope one day I’ll “accidentally” hit Return.
I haven’t deleted your text that says “I love you” from my phone. I feel like it’s a talisman that will one day bring you back.
I think of you every day, except for the days that I think about not thinking of you.
I hope one day I’ll love him as much as I still love you.
Your mom and sister still adore me, I hope that kills you inside when she's laying on top of you shirt rolled up.
This blog and it's readers have seen the chaotic rollercoaster of emotions I've felt since that day in October, the 26th to be exact. I've gotten too many opinions and feelings and ideas from everyone about why this was the best thing for me or why it was possibly the worst. Everytime my heart was broken, I hit a new low. Lows too immense for this blog to see. I made bad decisions, gave in at the wrong times, so lost and confused. I fell out of my old life, slowly severed ties with people, and clung to those who seemed to only want my best interest. After 5 Months, 1 Week, 6 days, countless FFD's, many episodes of the Price is Right, thousands of deleted texts, innumerable beautiful kisses, and an infinite number of broken promises, I am saying
Goodbye Old Love.
2 comments:
Alright, so it's finally happening. I got a publisher and will be talking to them about my book shortly. Please tell everyone you know to view and follow my blog (as well as post comments). The more followers I get, the more interested the publishers will be in speeding up the process! Thanks!
that has to be so hard. i'm proud of your courage and strength.
Post a Comment